Welcome to Part 3 of my blog series. Click the links to read Part 1 and Part 2. Also, please email me with any feedback that you might have on the series. Now, continuing on to 10th grade – Freshman year in college.
10th grade: Alright, my speech is better, but still not great.
On my first day of class, I started a conversation with someone while I walked from the parking lot to class. I think I mentioned something about a cloud in the sky. I remember the boy looking at me and saying, “What? Blah, blah, blah, blah.” It was then I realized my speech was not as improved as I thought and I could hear more words that he was saying, but still could not understand full sentences.
11th and 12th grade: A decline in my vision and “She’s retarded.”
At this time, my vision started to get worse and worse. I stop being able to read text, to see what was on the board, and to drive safely. I was also having many, many migraines. My parents kept taking me to my opthamologist to see if he could help.
Over time, he seemed to get annoyed and asked my mom to speak with him privately. He told my mom that he thought I was making up my problems for attention. My mom got furius and told him, “Can’t you see her eyes wandering in and out? This is the worst I have ever seen it. Her eyes are going so far out, I feel like she’s going to lose one.” My mom asked if he knew of anyone else who could treat me and he gave my mom the contact information for another opthamologist in Albuquerque.
Surprisingly, after one visit to the new opthamologist and wa little adjustment of my contact lens prescription, I was seeing again. I still had eye strain and couldn’t read as much, but it was manageable.
At this time as well, my vision was not good enough to take the SATs in a normal-sized font, so with a note from my opthamologist, my mom was able to arrange for me to get the large-print version of the test.
Come test day, I showed up at the testing site to check in. The proctor greeted me and stated, “Oh, you are Elizabeth. Please sit over there.” She pointed to a desk away from everyone else. I took my seat and found a giant poster-sized SAT test on the desk. I heard a couple of classmates chatting. One said, “Why does Betsy have such a big test?” The other replied, “She’s retarded.” At the time I was hurt, but I ended up doing just fine on the SAT and got into college.
Summer of my 11th grade year: I thought they were talking about bowling.
This memory really stands out to me as one of the most embarrassing and upsetting moments in my life. In the summer of my 11th grade year, I went to Wisconsin to work in the kitchen at a girls’ overnight summer camp. I was really excited because I thought it would be a fresh start. No one there knew my past and I could make friends.
One evening, a group of my coworkers were standing together chatting. I went up to the group and was listening. I thought they were talking about bowling, so I made a joke about being a pro and getting all strikes.
Everyone turned their head and looked at me in horror. I then glanced up at the TV to avoid all of the shocked eyes. Turns out there was a program about 9/11 on and they were all deep in conversation about what happened that day. I felt horrible.
Freshman year: I can’t understand anything in college and I can’t read again.
I showed up to my classes and quickly discovered that I could not understand what my professors were saying in class. This meant I could not take notes. My eyes were also out of control again, so I could not write or read without having my eyes cross or getting a migraine. I also could not see what was on the board. I feared I would fail out.
Freshman year: “I know what’s wrong with you.”
I went to the Disability Services Office on campus because at this point I thought maybe I would qualify for a hearing aid now. I walked in there and met with the director. I started explaining my issues and she said immediately, “I know what is wrong with you.” I thought, “Wow, really? This is a huge relief.”
She said that she could tell from the way I was talking that I had a speech impediment issue and an auditory processing disorder. She printed out a sheet, signed it, and told me to go to the Speech and Hearing Clinic on campus for testing. I was so excited. I had no idea those clinics existed. I went there and they performed a variety of tests. They were shocked with my results.
They explained that, according to the tests, I was disabled in about 60 different areas and they did not understand how I was functioning but that I should be very proud that I made it this far through school. They said that usually with my case, I was much more likely to be working at McDonalds, in jail, or on the street. They explained that I needed intensive therapy and asked if I was willing to work hard and do it. I said, “Yes, sign me up!”
I started going to therapy several times a week for two-hour sessions. Not only did they help me with my speech and hearing, but they coached me on how to interact in social situations, like how to check out at the grocery store successfully when you cannot understand what the clerk is saying. I was very fortunate to have had this opportunity and to get a discount since I was a student. This discount made the therapy affordable and possible.
That is all for today. I will post Part 4 tomorrow.
Please, if you are questioning therapy, give it a try. Who knows what possibilities it will bring? If you have any questions or need some support, please email me through the contact form.
I am here for you.
Sincerely,
Betsy
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